I’ve been kind of sad lately (sad might be too strong of a word). It doesn’t have to do with getting older, because I know that I am still young in the grand scheme of things. I guess it has more to do with seeing things end that I don’t want to see end. These things might seem silly to most of you who read it… but hey, I’ve always admitted that I am a different breed.
In May, I will take in my last Star Wars movie. This series has been a part of my life since I was three or four. There’s a certain element of sadness for me knowing that this will be the last new Star Wars movie that I’ll see. I have so many fond memories of this series from when I was a kid… I guess the end of this series finally symbolizes the end of a special part of my childhood.
U2 just put out a new album… but most of the band members are around 45 years old. I just don’t know how many more albums they are going to put out before they hang it all up. Their music is pretty much the only music that I’ve listened to for the past seven or eight years. It’s sad to know that there will be a day when I will have listened to my last new U2 album.
On Sunday night I attended a concert in downtown St. Louis. I was able to drive right next to Busch stadium. (It was weird seeing it empty and dark.) Part of me is sad that this will be the last year that I will be able to see games in that stadium. I’ve also had a hard time NOT hearing Jack Buck call games on the radio the past several years.
My daughter Emily is two years and eight months old. Why can’t she stay this age forever? She is so much fun… and she is still so loving and willing to cuddle… and she is the absolute joy of my life. I get sad when I think that in about ten years, she’ll probably want to avoid me as much as possible. I don’t like to think about young adult Emily… she is so adorable as the small, petite, and curious little girl that I know her as right now.
Christmas is right around the corner. This past week in church, we had a family light the advent candle and share that they used to have Christmas traditions, but as their kids grew up… most of their traditions disappeared. Thinking about changing Christmas traditions is really sad to me. I like the way I celebrate Christmas now… but I know a day is coming when how I celebrate Christmas will change.
One thing that I have really tried to do is take advantage of the ‘now.’ Will I enjoy U2 and Star Wars any chance I get until they are gone? You bet. Will I try to get to Busch stadium as many times as I can this next summer? Absolutely. Will I enjoy each and every Christmas that God allows me to celebrate? Yep. Will I try my best to ‘soak in’ Emily now while she is actually WANTING to spend time with me? Every chance I get.
I guess the one thing that I cling to in all of this is that God never changes. I don’t have to worry about his feelings and preferences shifting on me. I don’t have to wonder if there will ever be a time when He won’t be present or available. I don’t have to ever worry about being completely alone. Though He has changed methods and avenues of communication throughout history… His love for humanity, His holiness, His sovereignty HAS never and WILL never change.
Just because certain periods of life, that have brought me great joy, will fade into the past; that doesn’t mean that there won’t be more seasons of life that can bring me just as much joy in the future. Time is elusive and life is changing all the time; but thankfully, God is neither elusive or changing. And that is something that nothing or no one on this earth can offer me.
“I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.” -Revelation 22:13
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